


Toothpaste on the Mirror

by hotelcortez



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, Mutual Pining, Woolix, woolix are soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-16
Updated: 2019-02-16
Packaged: 2019-10-29 13:45:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17809070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hotelcortez/pseuds/hotelcortez
Summary: Woojin had always been a little protective of his dongsaengs.But when Felix comes home from practice one day with red eyes and a shocking revelation, he realises that he may be a tiny bit more protective of a certain little koala than of anyone else.





	Toothpaste on the Mirror

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, hello! Welcome to my newest brain splurge xx
> 
> You've clicked on a Woolix fic so you must be an intellectual. It's kinda long but I had a lot of fun writing it so I hope you don't get too bored.
> 
> TW: Implied homophobia, character is scared to come out at the beginning, there is one paragraph that references mild bullying. Please don't read if that may upset you, always stay strong and stay safe xx
> 
> I hope you enjoy this <3

Woojin had always been a little protective of his dongsaengs. 

He was well aware that when you looked at the group, it always appeared that Chan was the paternal one who’d swoop in to beat up playground bullies if his one of the younger members ever came with tear tracks and skinned knees, and Minho was the one who wouldn’t hesitate to slap up someone who even dared to look at the little ones the wrong way. But Woojin could be a right mama-bear when he wanted to be. 

For example, there was the time when they were all trainees and some older kids had started giving Seungmin a hard time every time he came back from school. It had taken them a while to notice, but Woojin could still remember the tears shining in Seungmin’s eyes when the books had been knocked out of his hands and harsh names had been spewed at him. No one knew who it was that had tipped off the management about the secret alcohol stash those underaged kids had been hiding, but they’d all watched as the kids were kicked out the company, careers lost and reputations ruined.

There was also the time that someone in JYP had thought it’d be funny to spread a rumour that Jisung had failed his monthly evaluation and they were going to send him home. They’d all been there to witness the cruel laughter and mocking Jisung had received as a result, and the way he was shouted down every time he tried to defend himself. Woojin had practically felt the embarrassment and confusion rolling off Jisung at the time, and it had been enough for him to step in with a loud yell, scolding all the kids for believing everything they heard and hurting other people as a result.

It was safe to say, Woojin looked out for his kids.

So when Felix came home from a one-on-one dance lesson one day with slumped shoulders and a devastated face, Woojin knew something was up.

He hadn’t been too worried at first; it was relatively normal for a member to come back from some sort of lesson looking down. Sometimes there was just that one dance move you couldn’t get right or that one note you couldn’t hit and you just needed the love and encouragement from the other members to remind that it didn’t make you any less worthy, that it didn’t mean you weren’t a valid part of the group. Woojin himself had fallen victim to that curse many a time, and the others had always been there to prop him up.

Or sometimes the members were completely exhausted whenever they finished a lesson. This didn’t usually apply to vocal lessons but happened more often that not with dance ones. But they’d all learnt now how to recognise exhaustion in one another, even when whoever it was tried to hide it. So whenever one of the signs were spotted, the other members would make sure they got straight to bed. 

But it didn’t take long for Woojin to realise that what he could see in Felix wasn’t exhaustion, and it wasn’t frustration. Chan had called him into the kitchen as soon as he’d arrived back at the dorm. The other members were all sat round the table at this point and Woojin had been about to serve up dinner, so Felix’s arrival home had been perfectly timed. 

But then his footsteps outside the door had been slow and hesitant and the figure who appeared in the doorway looked defeated, hands fidgeting and eyes on the floor, a faraway look adorning his shiny irises. 

Woojin and Chan had shared a look almost instantly, both immediately prepared to check how long Felix had slept the night before and whether practice had gone okay. Both his answers to the questions had been monotone one-syllable utterances and the concern of everyone in the room had immediately spiked. When Felix was tired he got whiny, and when he was angry at himself he got stubborn and distant, but this… this was completely different. 

Felix looked downright upset. The corners of his mouth were drooped and his eyes were slumped down slightly, vision barely lifting off the floor as he took small bites of his food, hardly eating anything on his plate. Chan had tried to encourage him, tapping his fork against the side of his plate a few times and loudly exclaiming about how delicious the meal was, but Woojin doubted Felix had even noticed, the younger seemingly too wrapped up in whatever thoughts were whirring through his mind. 

By the time dinner had ended, Woojin had already decided he was going to corner Felix and they were going to talk. A brief few seconds of eye contact with Chan had established that Woojin wanted to be the one to do it, so Chan just sighed and immediately ordered everyone to start cleaning up. Felix had hesitantly stepped in to help when Chan had hinted in his not-so-subtle way that Felix maybe wanted to take a shower after his dance practice.

Surprise had appeared in Felix’s eyes, before it was replaced by a knowing look and then completely swamped by dejection. Woojin’s concern had ramped up even more watching the emotions play on Felix’s face before the younger nodded and trailed out the room. 

As soon as his footsteps were out of earshot, the entire room had exploded into cries of “Hyung, is he okay?” and “Hyung, what happened to Felix?” and Chan had been quick to shush everyone before they got too loud, promising them all that Woojin was going to take care of it. 

So, here Woojin was. Sitting on the bunk bed in the room that he and Felix shared with Minho and Jeongin, except he had settled himself on his own bottom bunk, rather than trying to climb up to Felix’s top one. It didn’t really matter where they sat anyway, so long as another member didn’t come barging in. Woojin trusted that most of them had enough sense not to do that, and that Chan would stop any of them that tried. 

He waited until he heard the shower turn off in the next room before putting down his phone, quickly texting Chan that Felix was probably going to turn up in the room in the next few minutes.

Unsurprisingly, Woojin was right and he turned to the doorway the moment he heard the door squeak, Felix shuffling through wearing white sweatpants and a loose, grey t-shirt. A faded, light blue towel was wrapped around his shoulders, catching the drips that were still falling from his wet hair.

He paused momentarily in surprise when he spotted Woojin on the bed but shrugged it off as he continued over to the desk in the room to put his phone on charge. He’d expected Woojin to be with the other members who he could hear making a racket in the living room. But it was still a room he shared with three other people, so it wasn’t unusual to have one of his roommates lounging around in it. 

Hoping Woojin would just go back to whatever it was he’d been doing, Felix threw the towel over back of the desk chair and trailed over to the ladder to his bed and put his hands on it, preparing to pull himself up.

“Felix,” the soft voice from Woojin stopped him and Felix whipped around, not failing to notice the concerned tone Woojin had failed to hide. His heart sank when he caught Woojin’s eyes, recognising the paternal look in them that meant that was no way Woojin was going to let him go tonight with making him talk. 

“Come sit with me,” Woojin said gently, as he watched Felix freeze by the ladder. Felix briefly considered bolting out the door, not at all wanting to share what he knew Woojin would be able to draw out of him, but then he remembered that there were seven other people in the dorm and Chan could really move at the speed of a real-life kangaroo when he wanted to. 

Woojin watched as a deer-in-the-headlights look appeared on Felix’s face and prepared himself to make chase, but then Felix’s entire body seemed to deflate and he dragged himself reluctantly over to the bed, shoulders slumped and posture defeated. Woojin swallowed heavily, not knowing if he preferred this Felix or the Felix that was about to run away.

Barely even sparing Woojin a glance, Felix flopped down on the bed next to him, leaving a good few inches of space between them. Woojin reached up to loop an arm round Felix’s shoulders but Felix dodged away, averting his eyes so he wouldn’t catch the hurt look on the elder’s face. 

Now this set off huge alarm bells in Woojin’s head. Felix was notorious for being clingy, and always craved affection no matter how he was feeling. It was common that various members found themselves being hugged from behind by a certain young koala or felt a small hand hesitantly sliding into their own. And Felix always melted whenever someone came to initiate similar contact with him first. The fact that he was now actively avoiding attention like this was something Woojin had never seen the entire time he had known Felix, and the realisation scared him, making him wonder exactly what had happened during dance practice earlier that day. 

“Lix,” Woojin started off soft, staring at the boy who was still refusing to look anywhere near Woojin, “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Felix instantly mumbled, squirming under the intense gaze he could feel on him.

“You must think I’m really stupid if you think I’m going to believe that,” Woojin continued, words sharp but tone still gentle and caring, knowing that Felix may require a push but still not wanting to scare him away. 

Felix paused for a few seconds and his body stilled, limbs no longer twitching uncomfortably and gaze settling firmly on the floor instead of darting around. Woojin thought he might have actually gotten somewhere but then a laboured sigh left Felix’s lips and he opened his mouth.

“I’m fine, hyung,” the words were monotone and a blatant lie, “I’m just tired after practice.”

“Lix, I know what you look like when you’re tired,” Woojin said, shuffling himself a couple of inches closer, “And this isn’t it. What’s really wrong?”

Felix stiffened as Woojin got closer and his eyes flittered briefly in Woojin’s direction before darting away again, making sure he didn’t catch the fatherly look in Woojin’s eyes that he knew would make him spill everything. A large lump made its way into his throat and he tried to swallow it down, telling himself he had to calm down. He couldn’t break down in front of Woojin. He couldn’t let him know.

“Can we just leave it, hyung?” Felix practically whispered, heart pounding in his chest. Woojin almost flinched at the fear he heard in the younger’s voice, but he managed to hold down his surprise. He had to be the strong one now. What had happened to Felix was obviously a lot more serious than anyone of them had realised, and now Woojin needed to be the one to help him. 

“You know I can’t do that, Lix,” Woojin said softly, “Please tell me what’s going on.”

Felix just shook his head and turned his gaze completely away, not wanting Woojin to see the tears that had formed in his eyes at the gentle tone. It made Felix want to spill everything right there and then, to let go of everything that was storming inside of him and throw himself into Woojin’s arms, to let himself be comforted by the soft touches and calming words that he knew the elder would be more than happy to give. But he couldn’t do that, he couldn’t do that without the elder hating him and he knew that that would hurt more than not telling him ever could.

Woojin just sighed at the younger’s actions, knowing he wasn’t getting anywhere. Felix wasn’t usually a stubborn person. In fact, he was usually quite the opposite. It was quite easy for the other members to talk him into various plans and schemes that any firm-minded person wouldn’t agree to, and he was never fussy on occasions where they had to choose a takeaway or restaurant or something like that. Felix just went happily along with what everyone else wanted, his open-mindedness making it too difficult for him to be stubborn or put up a fight. 

But that didn’t mean he didn’t have a firm determined streak. A determined streak that had caused Felix to come all the way to Korea and chase his idol dreams, despite his parents’ dislike of it. A determined streak that caused him to defy JYP and spend hours and hours leant over Korean books to prove to him that he really did deserve to be in the group. A determined streak that kept him locked in the studio for hours at a time, mind set on being the best possible performer he could possibly be. 

Felix may not be a stubborn person, but his determination to be better often overrode his other emotions and made his only priority striving for strength. 

It was a trait that simultaneously enthralled and terrified Woojin, because if Felix didn’t have it then he might not have been there in Stray Kids with them today. But if he didn’t have it, then it would be a lot easier in moments like this for Woojin to figure out what was wrong. 

“You know you can tell me anything, right Lix?” Woojin decided to switch tactics, knowing Felix wasn’t going to admit anything unless he thought it was safe for him to do so. Maybe Woojin needed to build that safe atmosphere up before he decided to ask what was wrong again, maybe then he would make some progress.

“I know, hyung,” Felix said, but the words were a lie. Realistically, Felix knew that Woojin was being 100% sincere, but the voices in his head and the demons in his mind were whispering to him that Woojin would still hate him if he learnt what had happened that afternoon, that the entire group would kick him out if they knew who Felix really was.

Woojin heard the hesitation in Felix’s voice and it broke his heart. Without thinking, he reached out to hold Felix’s hand and a fresh wave of fear soared through his veins when he flinched away. He needed to fix this. He needed to fix this now.

“Felix,” Woojin said, “Why can’t I touch you?”

Felix paused at the question, racking his brain for what his response should be. Millions of words played over and over in his mind, a huge number of answers he could potentially give, but he kept coming back to the same phrase, to the same truth that was becoming harder and harder to hide.

“I don’t deserve to be touched by you, hyung,” Felix whispered, “By any of you.”

“What?” Woojin’s heart raced, mind reeling as he tried to tell himself that he had heard Felix wrong, that those awful words had not just come out of his friend’s mouth.

“Don’t deserve it,” Felix choked on the words, forcing back the sob that tried to escape with them. Woojin felt his heart drop.

“Why the hell would you think that?” he asked, his voice a cruel mixture of sadness, confusion, worry and guilt, “Why would you think that, Felix?”

Felix heard the emotions in Woojin’s voice, he heard the distress that the older couldn’t hide and he just broke. He completely broke. His shoulders shook and he buried his face in his hands as he sobbed loudly into them, entire body shaking with the force of his cries. It felt like his soul was being torn apart by fear and he could only cry harder as his knees tightened against his chest and his heart threatened to pound out his ribcage.

He briefly registered strong arms wrapping around his frame and a large hand tangling itself in his hair, gently stroking through the tangled locks as he was pulled against a firm chest. Despite every one of his nerve endings setting alight at the contact, despite every atom in his body trying to pull him away, Felix allowed himself to relax into the embrace. He buried his face in Woojin’s chest and clung to his t-shirt, sobbing as he pulled himself closer. 

“It’s okay, Lixie. It’s okay, I’m here,” Woojin whispered as he began to rock Felix back and forth, still completely shocked at the sudden breakdown but not letting it stop him from comforting his friend, “It’s all going to be okay, I promise. Hyung’s right here, just keep breathing for me.”

The words only made Felix cry harder and he began to spew apologies into Woojin’s chest, hating himself for burdening the older like this, hating himself for letting himself break down when he knew he didn’t deserve to. 

But deep down… deep, deep down… he craved the affection. He wanted Woojin to know what had happened, he wanted Woojin to hold him, he wanted Woojin to tell him that it was all going to be okay, he wanted Woojin to help him feel safe. 

He wanted Woojin to remind him he was loved.

“Hey, don’t apologise,” Woojin never failed to give him what he wanted, “Shhh Felix, it’s okay. Hyung’s right here with you.”

Felix practically melted at what he heard and, before he knew it, the words were practically spilling out of his mouth. He spoke them into Woojin’s chest but he knew they were loud enough and to be heard and, as much as kept criticising himself for saying them, he couldn’t bring himself to stop.

“Practice today was really, really bad, hyung,” he started, “My teacher found something out and he was so angry. He was so, so angry and I was so scared and if you find out you’ll be angry too. Please don’t be angry at me. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I don’t deserve this comfort from you. I’m sorry.”

“Hey, Felix, shhh,” Woojin listened as the words tumbled out of his friend, confusion and concern sparking within him as he processed what he was listening to, “Don’t apologise, okay? Hyung won’t be angry, not at you, okay? Just please tell me what’s going on. Please.”

Felix took a deep breath at the words. By this point, his sobs had reduced to slow, pained sniffles and his emotions were quiet enough that he was able to somewhat focus. It was now that he realised there was no going back. Woojin already knew too much and he was not going to stop until he knew everything. 

This was the moment in which Felix would either lose everything or gain everything. 

“My instructor, he…he asked me if there were any songs I wanted to try and choreograph something for,” Felix started off shakily, “So… so I said that maybe I wanted to try something by… by… you know that gay idol, Holland?”

“Yeah…” Woojin replied, already trying to put the puzzle pieces together in his head, not liking the picture he thought they might be forming. 

“And suddenly he got this really, really angry look on his face,” there were tears in Felix’s voice now and Woojin held him tighter, “He started shouting about how he would never support someone disgusting like that, how it was sickening someone like Holland would dare to exist in the public.”

Felix let out of couple of scrambled breaths as he tried to calm his beating heart, tried to let his thoughts catch up with him for a couple of minutes as he realised what he was about to reveal.

“He was shouting so loud, hyung. I was so scared,” Felix continued, fists tightening on Woojin’s t-shirt, “And the words he was saying… god, they were so awful.”

“That’s terrible, Felix,” Woojin soothed as his hands continued their motion of rubbing circles onto Felix’s scalp, “I’m so sorry you had to hear that.”

“And then,” Felix kept going, “Then he just went really quiet and he looked at me in this really odd way. And in that moment, I realised he just knew. He knew, hyung. He knew all of it.”

“Knew what, Lix?” Woojin asked. 

“He asked me if I was gay,” Felix whispered, so quiet that Woojin almost missed it, hitches corrupting his every syllable.

“And… and what did you say?” Woojin asked, a million thoughts racing through his mind as he tried to come to terms with the fact that he probably already knew the answer to his own question.

“I… I couldn’t lie to him, hyung,” Felix was full-on crying now, sobbing loud enough for the whole dorm to hear, “I said yes. Oh god, I said yes. He was so angry and he started screaming and shouting and I was so scared and I can’t believe I told him.”

Woojin’s breath all left him in a rush, had… had Felix just come out to him? Did Felix just sound scared admitting something that Woojin would have accepted all along? Shock fogged his mind and surprise soared through his veins, a whole range of questions exploding in his mind as his brain tried to catch up with what was happening right in front of him. Had Woojin missed this all the time he had known Felix? Had Felix been struggling to hide it the whole time when he never, ever should have had to?

“Please don’t hate me, hyung” Felix’s strangled plea broke Woojin out of his daze, and unimaginable sadness rooted itself deep into his very soul as Felix kept going, “I’m so sorry, hyung. I’m so sorry. Please don’t hate me. Please don’t kick me out. I can’t help it. I’m so sorry.”

“Oh god, Felix no,” Woojin sobbed as he pulled Felix closer, “I could never hate you. Never. Not for this, not ever. Felix, please listen to me. I love you, I love you so much. You… this… you being gay, it doesn’t change that. It won’t ever change that. God, Felix I couldn’t ever hate you.”

Felix continued to sob in Woojin’s arms, entire body racking with the force of it. But there was something rawer about it now… something more relieved, like Felix was actually allowing himself to be vulnerable now. 

“What that instructor said to you is not okay,” Woojin whispered into Felix’s hair, “What you heard is not true. You have nothing to be ashamed of, Felix, absolutely nothing.”

“But…” Felix whimpered.

“No buts,” Woojin cut in, “He had no right to say that. And he couldn’t be more wrong. There is nothing wrong with you, Lix. When you’re ready to tell the others about this, I promise you they’ll agree with me.”

Felix flinched at the mention of him telling the others, but Woojin could still feel that he was a lot calmer now. His body was shaking significantly less than it was before and although is breathing was still irregular, Woojin could tell it had slowed down some. It was likely that he was still shocked from suddenly coming out and the events of that afternoon so Woojin refused to let go of him, knowing Felix would feel more relaxed in his arms. 

“Do you… do you really think they’d all be okay with this?” Felix whispered the question, now playing with a loose thread on Woojin’s t-shirt.

“Lix, you know as well as any of us that all nine of us will love each other no matter what,” Woojin said, “I know this isn’t Australia and I know Korea is a little behind in terms of acceptance. But god Felix, we all love you to bits. You being gay will never ever be enough to make all of that love go away.”

A few more tears left Felix’s eyes at the words, but Woojin suspected they were more a result of relief than of sadness and the thought helped to calm his own chaotic mind. Woojin was still surprised from Felix’s revelation, saddened by what had happened to him and angry… so goddamn angry at Felix’s instructor. 

“Felix,” Woojin called and, for the first time, Felix looked up to meet his eyes. Woojin sucked in a breath at the pure emotion in Felix’s irises, at the shiny tears still glistening on his freckles, at the raw, unfiltered, childlike vulnerability Felix had painted across his face. It only made what Woojin was about to say harder, but he knew he still had to say it.

“You know you’re going to have to tell someone, right?” Woojin said gently, “We can’t let that instructor continue to work here.”

“No!” Felix’s reaction was immediate as he began to struggle in Woojin’s grip, “No! Then they’ll ask what happened and I’ll… I’ll have to tell that I’m… that I’m gay. They can’t know, hyung! They can’t!”

“Hey Lix, shhhh, it’s okay,” Woojin said as Felix continued to struggle, “It’ll just be one manager, okay? Just one manager who will get the problem sorted and then the instructor will be gone.”

“Hyung… I can’t… what if the manager feels the same way as the instructor?” Felix’s voice cracked and Woojin cupped his face, staring his dead in the eyes.

“Felix, I promise you, it’ll be okay,” Woojin said, “I am going to be right there with you and if in the unlikely event that does happen, then I will get you out straight away and I will hug you so much you won’t be able to breathe. You are going to be safe and comfortable here and I don’t care how many people I have to get fired to make that happen.”

“Hyung…” Felix said, seemingly at a loss for words now and Woojin slowly leaned down and planted a kiss on his forehead, smiling warmly at the blush that coated Felix’s freckles at the action.

“You don’t need to say anything, Lixie,” Woojin whispered into his hair, “Hyung’s always going to be here for you.”

At the words, Felix’s small hands dropped from where they were gripping Woojin’s t-shirt and instead both arms wrapped around Woojin’s neck, Felix pulling himself in for a tight hug that conveyed all the love and gratefulness he couldn’t put into words. Woojin just hugged him back and contented himself with the knowledge that Felix had just revealed a secret he had been holding onto way too long, a secret that Woojin was now to going to use to further alleviate all of Felix’s fears and worries. 

“Thank you, hyung,” Felix whispered into Woojin’s shoulder and Woojin squeezed him harder.

“You don’t need to thank me for accepting you, Lix,” he said, “You don’t ever need to thank anyone for that.”

Felix fell asleep soon after that. It was only about 9pm but Woojin figured all the emotion and late nights spent at the studio had finally taken its on toll on him, and he found himself smiling at the sight of the younger curled up in his arms, completely at peace. It was times like this that Woojin was reminded just how young all the members were, especially someone like Felix whose freckles and chubby cheeks gave him an adorable, little baby face. Felix looked almost like a child now that the weight of the world was temporarily lifted off his shoulders and Woojin almost didn’t want to let him go.

But he knew he’d have to go and find the other members and reassure them that everything was being taken care of. So, he reluctantly untangled Felix from him and laid him gently down on the bed, uncaring of the fact that he was likely going to have to sleep in Felix’s bed that night since Felix had accidentally stolen his own. A small whimper escaped the sleeping boy at the loss of contact, but Woojin quickly shushed him and draped a blanket over him to make up for the lack of warmth. He then stroked Felix’s hair for a couple of minutes to ensure the younger got back to sleep before wiping all the leftover tears off his face and tiptoeing out of the room, quietly turning off the lights and shutting the door as he left. 

He came in to a living room filled with seven worried faces, all the boys spread out on the sofas and floors as they made light conversation that stopped the moment Woojin came in the room.

“Oh my god, hyung!” Jisung exclaimed, eyes immediately snapping to the doorway to see if Felix would follow Woojin in, “Is everything okay? We heard Felix crying.”

“He’s okay now, Sungie, I promise,” Woojin said reassuringly as he sat down, trying to hide the mild panic he had at the members hearing what was said, “Did you hear what we were talking about?”

“No, we couldn’t,” Chan answered, not missing how panicked Woojin seemed at the idea of them potentially listening in, “We heard him crying and we knew you were talking, but it wasn’t clear enough to hear what it was about.”

“Chan-hyung wouldn’t let us go in,” Jeongin pouted from the other end of the sofa, “We all wanted to run in and hug him but hyung said it was best to give him space.”

“I know you hate to hear it, but hyung was right,” Woojin said, reaching over and ruffling the maknae’s hair, “Felix loves you all, but it definitely would have panicked him if you all came rushing in.”

“Are you definitely sure he’s okay?” Seungmin spoke up, biting his lip worriedly as he looked up at Woojin.

“He’s alright now, I promise. He fell asleep almost immediately after he finished crying so he’s resting now,” Woojin responded before letting out a sigh and turning so he was facing the entire group, “It’s not really my place to explain what was wrong.”

“We know that, hyung,” Changbin immediately responded, “We honestly weren’t expecting you to come in here and tell us everything.” 

“I know, but there are some things you should know,” Woojin said, “Felix’s instructor said some very awful things to him today. Some things he most definitely did not have the right to say and it really shook Felix up. I’m not going to tell you what was said or what the subject matter was, because that is something Felix will have to tell you if and when he’s ready but do know that I’m taking Felix to a manager in the morning, and we’re getting that instructor fired.”

“Oh my god,” Hyunjin responded, “Was it really that bad, hyung?”

“It was bad,” Woojin confirmed, “Felix was terrified and really, really hurt. I won’t stand for that.”

“No, none of us will,” Chan said firmly, “I trust you both enough to know that you’re making the right decision and that you’re doing what’s right for Felix and the rest of the group.”

“Definitely,” Minho added, “I know I don’t really have leader or eldest of the group authority but I’m still one of Felix’s hyungs and I saw how upset he was. No one gets to make a member of the group feel like that, so I fully support what you’re doing.”

“Thank you, guys, Woojin said sincerely, he would have gone to the manager regardless of whether he got their permission or not, but it felt good to know they were on his side, “Felix will really appreciate that as well.”

“Well, we’ll let him know in the morning then,” Chan said, “If letting him know he always has our support will cheer him up, then I’m perfectly happy to remind him.”

“Oh, trust me,” Woojin said knowingly, “It will.”

 

. . .

 

Things got a little easier for Felix after that. Woojin hadn’t noticed before but it seemed now that Felix had come out to one of his members, there was a weight off his shoulders. The weight wasn’t significant, not enough to be noticed if you weren’t the one Felix had come out to, but Woojin saw it all the same. It made him wonder how long Felix had been hiding this and how none of them had seen it before. 

But most of all, it made him think of how flattered he was to be the one that Felix had told first. Woojin didn’t know why the thought of that sent his heart racing and mind scrambling, but that didn’t stop it happening. From then on, every time Felix touched him, every time Felix sent one of his dazzling smiles Woojin’s way, it made Woojin feel extra… special. Like it was only him and Felix in the room.

Woojin didn’t know why Felix coming out to him had had this kind of effect on him, but he couldn’t think of any other explanation for why he was suddenly so flattered by everything Felix did. 

Maybe they had a much closer friendship now… yeah, that had to be it. 

It had been a few weeks since the incident in dance practice and the instructor had long been fired. Woojin had only had to say the words “Felix, gay, instructor, homophobic” once in the same sentence for the manager to go into a frenzy of kindly apologising to Felix and angrily demanding that the instructor be sent to his office for a word. Within the hour, the instructor had his bags packed and Felix felt at ease again. Woojin could tell he had been comforted by the positive reaction from the manager and he had been so glad to be the one to hold Felix close throughout the entire process, watching gratefully as the frown on the younger’s face turned into a relieved smile.

The group were now all gathered in the same practice room that the instructor had yelled at Felix in, but this time the practice was being led by Chan and Minho. Minho was taking them all through the dance whilst Chan just tried to stop Jeongin from trying to kill Seungmin and Hyunjin from attempting to jump up on Changbin’s back every few minutes, sending them both crashing to the floor. Felix was struggling to stand up from laughing so hard and Chan soon found he now also had to deal with Felix dissolving into giggles every other second.

Usually Woojin would be quite a useful help in these kind of situations given that he had quite a strong motherly influence on the group, but this time Woojin found he couldn’t keep his eyes off Felix. Seeing the young Australian doing what he loved and looking so happy with sweat coating his forehead and eyes crinkled up in happiness had completely enthralled Woojin and he watched Felix through the mirror, too distracted to even attempt focusing on something else. 

It was this that meant Woojin couldn’t get the moves right when they did get round to actually dancing. He kept forgetting the choreography or stumbling on the easy parts or going too fast when he was supposed to be going slow and the routine ended up a complete mess, Woojin bumping into at least three different people and ending up in the wrong spot more times than he was willing to admit. All because he found himself absolutely fascinated by watching the way Felix moved when he danced. It was only when Felix started throwing him concerned looks in the mirror that he realised he should probably be focusing on his own dancing and not someone else’s.

“Alright gang,” Chan said after a few dances, “Water break.”

Woojin dragged himself over to his water bottle and speculated on who in the group it was going to be that came to talk to him first. He had made a right mess of himself during that practice and he knew there was no way they hadn’t all noticed, and no way they were just going to let it go.

The group was like that, they all noticed instantly when something was up with someone and they all worked together to make it better. They had learned amazingly quickly what each member felt comforted by and how to cheer each other up, so it was hard for any of them to hide anything or to stay sad for long, because there was always another member there to chase the worries away. This was another reason Woojin was so surprised that Felix had been able to hide his fear of being rejected for being gay for so long. Woojin suspected that Felix had the fear even before he met the group, so they had never known anything different when they all got to know him and the thought of that broke Woojin’s heart. Maybe that was why Woojin had been looking out for Felix even more recently, because he honestly wanted the younger to know that he would always be accepted within the group. 

Woojin was still drinking when he heard footsteps approaching him from behind, probably Chan or Minho coming to give him a pep-talk since that was what usually happened when someone had a hard time during group practice. He almost jumped in surprise when instead of coming to sit in front of him, the mystery person dropped to the floor behind him and pulled Woojin in for a back-hug, their chin coming to rest on Woojin’s shoulder. Woojin sucked in a breath, he’d recognise those tiny hands anywhere. 

“Hyung,” Felix spoke directly in Woojin’s ear, “What’s wrong?”

Woojin turned his head so he was facing Felix and their eyes met over the top of Woojin’s shoulder, the two so close their noses were practically touching. From this position, Woojin was sure he could try and count Felix’s every freckle, could rake his eyes over Felix’s every eyelash, could gaze forever at all the perfect imperfections lining Felix’s face. He found himself struggling to answer the question for a second, feeling oddly panicked under Felix’s intense gaze. 

So, he did the only thing he could think of and quickly grabbed onto Felix’s arms for a second, pulling the younger off him so Woojin could turn around so he was now facing Felix and settle back down onto the floor. He then tugged Felix back into him so the younger was now practically resting in his lap. Felix squeaked a little in surprise at the action but sighed contently as he burrowed himself in Woojin’s chest, uncaring of the sweat that was coating them both in that moment. Woojin still felt oddly flustered around Felix, but at least he wasn’t staring at him like that anymore.

“I’m okay, Lixie,” Woojin made sure to answer, “Just struggling to get into practice today.”

Felix pouted at the words and Woojin had to stop himself from visibly melting at the sight, all coherent thought leaving him as Felix’s big eyes stared cutely up at him. It was in that moment that Woojin came to a very, very sudden realisation.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh no.

It all made sense now.

Woojin may or may not have been completely, 100%, definitely, positively, surely, totally, wholly head over heels for Lee Felix.

Uh oh.

“Are you sure, hyung?” Felix’s pouty voice cut through Woojin’s mild internal panic as he looked back down at Felix cuddled up to him, “You seem… distracted.”

“Distracted by you,” Woojin thought, but he didn’t dare say the words out loud, too afraid of the reaction he would get if he did. His heart was beating a mile a minute in his chest, so fast that he was surprised Felix couldn’t feel it. He swallowed heavily as he tried to get his emotions in check, not wanting anymore unnecessary worry or scrutiny from Felix or the rest of the group. 

“I’m not distracted, Lix,” Woojin was able to stutter out, “Just a little tired.”

It was the oldest trick in the book, pretending you were tired to cover up all your emotions and Woojin knew that Felix wouldn’t believe it for a second. The members all tried to use the same trick regularly and Woojin couldn’t think of a time any of them were successful. But Woojin knew that Felix wouldn’t pull him up on it here, not in front of everyone else, so he met Felix’s concerned eyes with a smile and squeezed the younger’s shoulders, definitely not almost having a heart attack when Felix practically melted at the action and pulled himself further into Woojin. 

The two cuddled like that until the break was over and Woojin found himself actually feeling more refreshed. It was still hard not to watch Felix every second, but at least he knew why he felt like that now and that no matter what happened, Felix would still always be one of his best friends. 

He managed to make it to the end of practice without worrying anyone further which was a relief and Chan smiled at him once they were finished, glad that Woojin seemed to be back on track. 

The car ride back to the dorm was peaceful as it was now late in the evening and most boys were just content to fall asleep in their seats on the way back. Woojin was sandwiched between Jeongin and Felix, both of the younger ones had clung to him as they’d left the studio and he’d practically carried them out as their eyelids drooped and bodies slumped. 

Changbin and Minho were in the two backseats but Woojin didn’t think they were particularly conscious either, not if the loud snoring was anything to go by. It was the loud snoring that actually prevented Woojin from falling into his own slumber, that and the two heavy weights pressed into either of his shoulders that meant he had no freedom to move his arms. 

An almost inaudible sigh left his lips as he leaned back and tried to get a little comfier, eyes closing as he compelled his body to rest.

“Hyung,” the whispered word drew Woojin out of his relaxation and he pulled his head back down to meet the eyes of Felix, who was groggily looking up at Woojin from where he was still leant on his shoulder. Woojin almost cooed at his adorably tired eyes. Who the hell looked that good when they were half-asleep?

“What is it, Lix?” Woojin whispered back, realising that he should probably actually respond to Felix. 

“Are you okay now, hyung?” Felix asked and Woojin felt warmth bloom in his chest. The fact that Felix was exhausted and already halfway to dropping off to sleep but still concerned about Woojin really meant a lot and the older only felt infinitely more attracted to him.

“I’m okay now,” Woojin responded quietly, “We’ll get back to the dorm and go to bed and in the morning it’ll be like today never happened.”

“Okay hyung,” Felix said, still pinning Woojin with his intense gaze, “If you’re sure.”

“I’m sure,” Woojin promised sincerely, trying to hide how eager he was to change the topic, “How are you feeling? I’ve noticed that you’ve seemed at bit more at ease recently after what happened with the instructor.”

A haunted look briefly appeared in Felix’s eyes at the mention of the instructor, but he quickly blinked it away, seemingly not wanted to get lost down that train of thought.

“I am more at ease actually,” Felix said, as he averted his gaze and snuggled further into Woojin, “I haven’t thought of what he said in a while, and I only have you to thank for that.”

“I already told you, you don’t need to thank me,” Woojin gently grabbed Felix’s chin and pulled the younger’s gaze back up to him, “Accepting you isn’t a chore for me, Lix, not at all.”

“I know, hyung,” Felix said quietly, “And I am trying to teach myself that, I promise. But you were so nice to me and honestly you made me more comfortable than anyone has ever made me, so I want you to know I’m grateful for that.”

“Of course, Lix,” Woojin smiled down at his friend, not failing to notice the slight pain that flashed in Felix’s eyes when he mentioned how Woojin had been the one to make him most comfortable. There was a story there… Woojin could sense it. A story possibly relating to Felix’s family or someone else who should have accepted him but didn’t. Felix was still hurting from it, Woojin could tell. But he also knew that a car full of other members would not be the place to bring it up, so he settled for putting his arm around Felix and pulling him close.

“I’m really glad I get to be that person to you,” Woojin whispered and Felix sighed contently, a small yawn leaving his lips a second later and Woojin giggled quietly. 

“Sleep, Lixie,” he whispered, slowly tangling his hands in Felix’s hair and rubbing soothing circles onto his scalp.

So Felix did. He burrowed further into Woojin and let himself rest comfortably against Woojin’s stomach, enjoying the warmth and safety he felt at having the elder’s arm around him.

And if Woojin’s heart skipped a beat at the sight of Felix falling asleep against him, he definitely didn’t let it show. 

 

. . .

 

It had been a week since the conversation in the car with Felix and Woojin was going mad.

A whole week of being completely and absolutely whipped for Lee Felix.

This was, of course, nothing new. Every member of Stray Kids, even the younger ones, had a soft spot for Felix. So it wasn’t exactly rare for Woojin to go into full mother-hen mode whenever he was around, but now every time Felix pouted he found himself wanting to kiss the pout off Felix’s lips, rather than simply ruffling his hair and pinching his freckled cheek like he usually would.

It was absolutely infuriating.

How was it at all fair that Felix could have this effect on him?

At least one good thing to come out of the whole experience was that Woojin’s parents were 100% accepting. Almost every night this past week, Woojin had called his mum to complain about how Chan had been coddling Felix instead of him, or how cute Felix looked in oversized hoodies, or to simply ask for advice on what he was supposed to do about this stupid goddamn crush that was already spiralling out of control.

Woojin’s mum had given the very predictable advice of simply telling Felix that Woojin liked him like that wouldn’t cause unimaginable levels of disaster. Woojin was sure that doing so would definitely cause the dorm to explode, maybe even the whole of JYP studios, possibly even the entire of South Korea.

So it was safe to say, that idea was not happening.

But then Woojin felt bad because he released how lucky he was to have his family be completely accepting of him and his choices. Although they never discussed it, Woojin had come to realise that maybe Felix’s parents weren’t as nice as the young boy made them out to be. The little twinkle of sadness that appeared in Felix’s eyes every time he mentioned them had led Woojin to believe that somewhere along the line, Felix’s parents hadn’t accepted him. Whether this was for being gay or something else entirely, Woojin didn’t know. But he was glad that his own parents were people he could happily take Felix home to. If Woojin had to share his parents with Felix to make him feel more accepted, then he was happy to do it. 

And that only made him realise even more how whipped he was. 

The group were currently spread out between two taxis on their way to the hotel that they would be staying in whilst they completed the various interviews and performances they had scheduled in this part of the country. 

Chan and Jeongin were sat in the middle set of seats in front of Woojin and Hyunjin, who were in the back. The leader was trying to wrap his head around the roommate system that the maknae had already come up with. 

“Right, I think I’ve got this,” Chan said, eliciting a snort from Woojin and Hyunjin who both seriously doubted that Chan had a clue what he was talking about, “You want to room with Seungmin?”

“Yes, hyung,” Jeongin nodded, sarcastically drawing the words out since he was sure he had explained this at least a hundred times. 

“And Hyunjin wants to room with Changbin?” Chan continued, counting the members down on his fingers as he spoke.

“Yes, hyung,” Hyunjin answered from the backseat, accompanying his words with a roll of his eyes.

“And Jisung wants to room with Minho?” Chan asked, looking a little more confident now that he thought he actually understood what was going on.

“Yes, hyung,” both Hyunjin and Jeongin answered at the same time, causing them both to burst out laughing as Woojin hid his smirk in his hands at the shocked, offended expression that appeared on Chan’s face.

The leader waited until they had all managed to calm themselves down and were all sat blinking innocently at him before he opened his mouth to speak again.

“So that leaves…” Chan trailed off, looking down at his remaining three fingers like he wasn’t quite sure what they were there for.

“Oh my god, hyung!” Jeongin exclaimed, smacking Chan lightly on the arm, “It leaves you, Woojin-hyung and Felix-hyung.”

Woojin had been laughing at the pair’s antics until he heard the last sentence that the maknae spoke, suddenly realising what situation he may be finding himself in.

“Woojin,” Chan turned to him, Woojin trying to telepathically scream at the leader to please not leave him in a room alone with Felix!

“If I room with the manager, do you want to go in with Felix?”

Woojin was sure that the words that were supposed to leave his mouth were something along the lines of an assertive “Absolutely freakin’ not!”. He wasn’t exactly sure how the overly enthusiastic “Yes!” escaped him instead.

Goddamnit.

Chan raised his eyebrows slightly at the reaction but nodded as he turned back around in his seat, seemingly convinced that he now understood the roommate arrangements now. 

“Wait a second,” the leader said, looking over at Jeongin, “Who are you rooming with again?”

And with that Woojin completely forgot what he had gotten himself into as Hyunjin beside him started laughing so hard he actually stopped breathing and Jeongin looked halfway between throwing Chan and throwing himself out the window. 

It took them another couple of hours to get to the hotel and by that point, the car had quietened significantly. It was well into the night now so Hyunjin and Jeongin had fallen asleep against the windows. Chan was just about still awake but had his headphones in and Woojin was slumped backwards in his own seat, having managed a roughly hour-long nap. 

He watched out the window as the hotel came into view and the taxi driver pulled up outside. Chan leaned over to gently shake Jeongin awake and Woojin did the same with Hyunjin, rubbing the boy’s shoulder as he slowly entered the waking world. 

They all exited into the cold air just as the other taxi arrived and so they went to help open the doors.

Minho and Changbin were the first out and although it was obvious they’d both been sleeping, they were awake enough to drag themselves out the car and lazily grab hold of their suitcases. 

Seungmin was next and he kind-of zombie-walked his way across the pavement with a low groan before practically throwing himself on top of Jeongin, the maknae giggling as he wrapped both arms around him to help hold him up.

Then came Felix and Jisung. The entire group snorted at the sight of Jisung seemingly sleep-walking as Felix tugged him out the car, holding him firmly to help keep him steady and awake.

Woojin followed drearily as the manager led them to reception to check in and then collected the room keys, ushering them down a corridor to the left to find their rooms.

They’d made it about halfway down an especially long corridor when Woojin was pulled out of his drowsiness by a tired groan from behind him. He turned to find Jisung draped all over Felix, arms dangling and face buried in the young Australian’s neck as light snores filled the air. Felix had one hand haphazardly wrapped around his waist to keep him up and was using the other arm to drag both his and Jisung’s suitcases down the corridor as he half-carried, half-dragged Jisung along with him.

Woojin probably would have laughed at what looked like some kind of absurd circus act if it wasn’t for the way that Felix’s arms were shaking from muscle strain and the fast pace at which he was panting. It was unclear how long Felix had been attempting this weird balancing act, but it had evidently been too long.

“Oh my god, Felix!” Woojin whisper-shouted, drawing the attention of the rest of the group as he rushed over to take one of the suitcases, “Why didn’t you get one of us to help?”

Felix stumbled slightly at the loss of extra weight and steadied himself against Woojin’s shoulder, almost falling again when the action caused Jisung to stir and press himself further into Felix’s side, incoherent mumbles tumbling from his lips.

Chan was next to them like a shot and quickly took the remaining suitcase from Felix, so he now had both arms free to carry (or drag along) Jisung. 

“You were all tired, hyung,” Felix mumbled in response to Woojin’s question, “I could manage.”

“You’re an idiot,” Chan responded light-heartedly as Felix groaned, shifting his body slightly so Jisung could rest more comfortably against his side. Woojin had to bite back his coo at Felix being so gentle and motherly with his bandmate. 

“Would you like me to take him?” Minho offered, gesturing to Jisung.

“Nah, it’s alright,” Felix shook his head, “He’d probably wake up, so I’ll just take him to his room. I wouldn’t mind if Chan-hyung and Woojin-hyung kept the suitcases for the moment though.”

“You’re an even bigger idiot if you think we’re giving them back to you anytime soon,” Chan immediately remarked, not even looking back from where he’d turned and gestured at everyone to start walking again.

“But hyuuuuuuung,” Felix whined from the back, “I’m going to need my case back when we get to my room.”

“Well then you’re not getting it back until you get rid of that lump on your shoulder,” Chan said, drawing tired laughs from everyone as they realised he was referring to Jisung. 

From then on, the conversation dulled until they made it to their set of rooms. Felix followed behind until he reached the doors and then he stopped short when he realised he had no idea where neither he nor Jisung were supposed to be going.

“Um guys,” Felix called as he paused outside a random door, “Who are Jisung and I rooming with?”

“Jisung’s in with me,” Minho said from outside his door, beckoning Felix over.

“And you’re in with Woojin,” Chan said to Felix, “He’s got your suitcase now anyway so just dump Jisung and go to that room there.”

Chan pointed to the door Woojin was unlocking as he handed Jisung’s suitcase to Minho. Woojin tried to gauge Felix’s reaction to the roommate news, but Felix seemed too pre-occupied with not completely collapsing under Jisung’s weight, so he was unable to manage more than a nod. So Woojin continued into his room with a shrug and used Felix’s suitcase to keep the door held open so Felix wouldn’t have to knock on the door when he came back.

In the next room, Felix was slowly dragging Jisung over to the bed closest to the door as Minho carefully placed down both the suitcases.

“Hyung,” came Felix’s strained voice, “Can you grab the covers?”

Minho looked up to see Felix stood tiredly over the bed, unable to move the covers out the way with both hands holding tight to the sleeping boy in his arms. Hurrying over, Minho quickly pulled the blankets away and Felix placed Jisung down with a relieved sigh, almost falling onto the bed himself as both Jisung’s hands clung to the fabric of his hoodie, apparently disliking the idea of losing their cuddle bug. 

“You’re really going to owe me one when you wake up in the morning, Sungie,” Felix muttered as he gently untangled himself from Jisung’s grip, eliciting a tired laugh from Minho who was untying Jisung’s shoes and slowly pulling them off the young boy’s feet.

Felix waited until he was done before pulling all the blankets back over Jisung, watching tiredly as he automatically snuggled into all of them with a content hum.

“Night, hyung,” Felix whispered as he pulled his eyes away, turning towards the door.

“Night, Lix,” Minho said, “Make sure you and Woojin-hyung don’t stay up too late, yeah?”

The words were accompanied by a wiggle of Minho’s eyebrows and despite his tiredness, Felix felt his heart begin to race.

“W-What do you mean, hyung?” he stuttered out, Minho’s face immediately breaking into a wicked grin.

“Oh nothing,” Minho said in a way that indicated it was definitely something, “Just don’t spend too long watching Woojin-hyung while he sleeps.”

Felix went bright red at the words and Minho cackled, throwing him a wink as Felix scurried out the room, shutting the door behind him with a firm click.

He made sure to take a deep breath before he entered his own room, not wanting to have to explain the furious blush still coating his cheeks.

“Sorry I took so long, hyung,” Felix called quietly as he slipped through the doorway, reaching out to take his suitcase from where it was keeping the door propped open, “Jisung can be really clingy when he wants to be.”

Woojin appeared from the bathroom wearing a loose dark green top and plaid pyjama bottoms. Felix immediately melted at the sight, unintentionally pausing in his struggle to tug the suitcase all the way through the doorway.

“It’s okay,” Woojin said as he came to help, “It was nice of you to take him to his room.”

“Well, I couldn’t exactly leave him to sleep in the hallway now, could I?” Felix remarked as they finally managed to pull the suitcase into the room.

“Honestly,” Woojin said, “I don’t think he would have noticed.”

Felix laughed as he pushed his suitcase over, crouching next to it and pulling out his usual white sweatpants and an oversized, purple v-neck top that Woojin was 99% sure had been his at one point.

“He would have killed me in the morning though,” Felix said as he pulled the t-shirt over his head, “Just imagine his reaction to waking up on the floor of a random hotel hallway, knowing Sungie he’d probably have a heart or attack or something.”

Woojin snorted at the mental image, the action causing him to accidentally spit toothpaste all over the mirror as he yanked his toothbrush out his mouth and tried not to choke on the minty foam suddenly spewing from his lips.

Felix immediately burst out laughing from where he had just appeared in the bathroom doorway and his loud laughs filled every corner of the room as he doubled over, face crinkled in happiness. Woojin feigned annoyance as his heart warmed, attempting to use his hands to wipe his chin.

“Lee Yongbok,” he said sternly, “Laugh at hyung again and you will be the one sleeping in the hallway tonight.” 

“No, hyung, please no! I’m sorry!” Felix managed through his giggles, running over to Woojin and staring up at him with large eyes, mouth still up-turned in a breath-taking smile.

For a moment, the two just stared at each other, a calm, blissful aura immediately blanketing its way comfortingly around them. Woojin didn’t know how to explain the euphoria that came with staring directly into Felix’s eyes, but it was so prominent he was practically breathing it in, causing his heart to race and thoughts to go into a frenzy.

Completely caught up in the moment, Felix’s hand slowly found its way into Woojin’s and just for a second, just for one tiny second, Woojin allowed himself to think that maybe Felix felt the same way as him, maybe there really was a magical spark between them. The ecstasy in his veins only ignited more when Felix’s eyes dropped down to his lips, a dreamy expression on his face, but then the younger caught sight of the toothpaste still dripping from his mouth and he burst out laughing once more, practically collapsing against Woojin’s chest. 

“You’re such a child,” Woojin remarked, wrapping one hand around Felix’s shoulders and using the other to grab a towel to wipe his face, “There’s toothpaste everywhere now and it’s all your fault.”

“Look at the mirror!” Felix exclaimed, pointing at his reflection from where he was still held tight in Woojin’s grip, “It’s covered!”

Woojin followed Felix’s gaze to find that the mirror was indeed completely splattered with toothpaste, Felix cracking up even more at Woojin’s huff at the sight.

“I’ll clean it in the morning,” he mumbled, squeezing Felix’s shoulder before letting him go, “But for now, I’m going to sleep. Don’t be too long, okay?”

“Of course, hyung,” Felix said gently, now seemingly calmed down, “Go lie down. I’ll just finish up in here and turn the lights off and go to bed.”

Woojin nodded as he left the room, resisting the urge to look back at Felix as the younger began to wash his face. He slipped into bed with an inaudible sigh, mind still reeling after what had happened in the bathroom.

For a second there, Felix had really looked like he felt the same way as Woojin. But the moment had been gone as quickly as it started and Woojin felt all his hopes crumble just as fast as they’d built up. There was no way Felix could feel that way towards him. It just wasn’t possible. 

His racing thoughts were interrupted by the sound of soft footsteps padding lightly across the room. Felix’s silhouette appeared in the darkness and Woojin watched as he made his way over to his bed, arms outstretched to prevent him from walking into anything. A slight ruffle sounded as Felix slipped himself into his bed and pulled the covers over his body, taking a few moments to settle into a comfortable position before the entire room stilled. 

“Goodnight, hyung,” Felix’s whisper broke the silence and Woojin felt comfort bloom in his chest.

“Night, Lixie,” Woojin whispered back, hearing the content hum from Felix across the room, “Sweet dreams.”

But Woojin wasn’t having sweet dreams. In fact, he wasn’t having any dreams at all.

He’d spent the last two hours tossing and turning in bed frustratedly trying to will himself to relax. He’d tried steadying his breathing. He’d tried closing his eyes. He’d tried to keep his whole body still. But nothing worked. His mind scrambled and his thoughts stormed and his skin was itching with the feeling of liking Felix but being unable to do anything about it. 

How on earth had he gotten himself into this situation? How had he been so stupid to fall for his own bandmate? Why hadn’t he been more careful?

The questions plagued his every movement as he rolled over in bed once more, facing the door of the hotel room rather than Felix’s bed. It was his tenth time in this sleeping position and he was no closer to falling asleep as he was when he’d been lying in this position the first time. 

There was no way he could keep going like this. He had to do something about it. But what?

The problem was so prominent, so goddamn loud, that Woojin was so wrapped up in it he didn’t hear a hesitant figure approaching him from behind. His thoughts were only halted by a small hand brushing against his shoulder, causing him to jump harshly. 

“Hyung,” the whisper was soft, and a little scared, but Woojin’s world still turned upside down at the sound of it, “Are you okay?”

Guilt immediately filled Woojin’s veins at the question and he buried his face in his pillow, glad that Felix was behind him and couldn’t see him properly. 

“I’m fine, Lix,” Woojin mumbled, “Go back to sleep.”

“You’re not fine, hyung,” Felix replied gently, “I’ve been listening to you toss and turn for hours.”

Woojin didn’t reply to that, too consumed by the self-hatred that came with the knowledge that he had kept Felix up, that he’d been worrying him this whole time. All because Woojin couldn’t keep his stupid feelings in check.

Felix sighed at the lack of response and Woojin heard shuffling from behind him. His body relaxed slightly in relief, Felix was probably going back to his own bed after realising Woojin was hopeless and there was nothing he could do to help him now. 

But then the bed dipped and Woojin felt the blankets shift slightly as someone wormed their way under them, filling the bed with a heavenly kind of warmth.

“Felix,” Woojin breathed out, turning to face Felix as the younger shuffled closer to him, making the warmth feel even more welcoming, “What are you doing?”

“I’m sleeping here,” Felix replied like it was obvious, one of his hands sliding down the bed to tentatively rest on top of the knuckles of Woojin’s left hand, “You’re upset and I don’t want you to feel alone.”

Woojin closed his eyes at the answer, trying to bury the deep longing and guilt that the words spurred within him. Having Felix so close to him, having his hands on his skin made everything so much harder for Woojin. It made him feel like he was floating, like his feelings were zigzagging uncontrollably in the clouds around him, like he could no longer ground himself to earth.

It sounded scary, but it also made him feel like he never ever wanted to be anywhere else. 

It was enough to make him go mad.

“I’m not upset,” Woojin lied, his voice a muffled whisper, “I just can’t sleep.”

Felix hummed in a way that indicated he didn’t believe a word Woojin was saying, but he didn’t call him out on it. Instead, he used both hands to cling to Woojin’s t-shirt and pull himself forward to bury his face in Woojin’s chest, cuddling up to the older boy and letting his limbs relax against soothingly against him.

Woojin jumped slightly at the action but didn’t even think as he brought his arms around Felix, holding him safely in his grip. Felix sighed contently as they snuggled, breathing in Woojin’s scent and allowing it to calm him. Woojin did the same as he buried his nose in Felix’s hair, feeling his nerves settle but also spark at the same time. 

“You know, hyung?” Felix spoke softly into Woojin’s chest, unable to mask the slight wisps of fear creeping into the edges of his voice, “I really like being close to you.”

Woojin’s hopes flamed at the words, but he pushed them down. Felix couldn’t mean what Woojin thought he meant. Felix couldn’t be implying that. Felix was speaking completely platonically and Woojin would be stupid to think of it any other way. 

“That’s cute, Lix,” Woojin hummed in response, struggling to control his emotions when Felix shook his head. 

“You don’t understand, hyung,” he said, face still hidden, “I really, really like being close to you. I like being close to you so much it hurts.”

A sharp intake of breath filled the air and it took Woojin a couple of seconds to realise it had come from him. There was no denying what Felix meant, not anymore, not if the hesitance and sincerity in his voice was anything to go by and Woojin’s mind went completely blank at the sound of it.

It was funny, two seconds ago Woojin hadn’t been able to stop thinking, but now his mind offered him absolutely nothing. Nothing but firm shock and disbelief that caused his entire body to freeze and mouth to go dry. 

“F-Felix,” he was able to stutter out, grip tightening almost painfully on the young boys in his arms, too afraid that he would disappear any second now and Woojin would wake up to find out this whole thing had been a cruel dream, “What are you trying to say?”

Felix seemed to pause for a couple of seconds, his body freezing up under Woojin’s fingertips as the cogs turned in his mind, trying to find the words that would express exactly what he was trying to say. But then he realised that there weren’t enough words in the universe to express this, not enough words in any language to help him convey what it was he desperately needed Woojin to know.

“Woojin-hyung,” the name left his mouth like a plea and he finally pulled his face out of Woojin’s chest to look up at him. Their eyes locked and Woojin gasped at the fierce longing in Felix’s eyes, the fierce longing that was accompanied by icy terror that Felix seemed to be anxiously trying to push down. 

The silence stretched on between them, broken only by fast breaths that escaped their lips as they stared into each other’s eyes. It grew more painful by the second and Felix couldn’t stand it. His palms were sweating and his mind was a mess and his heart was pounding and the question left his mouth before he could stop it, escaping his lips like word-vomit.

“Woojin-hyung, can I kiss you?”

Woojin’s eyes widened at the question and Felix felt his heart drop. He’d messed it all up. He’d ruined it. Woojin was going to be disgusted by him now and everyone was going to find out and then they’d all hate him. He was going to lose them. He was going to lose Woojin. 

He was going to lose Woojin… forever. 

“I’m so sorry,” he choked out, eyes watering as he frantically pushed himself off Woojin and sat up, trying to get away from the awful disbelief he could see on Woojin’s face, the expression making his heart physically shatter as he tried to make his escape. But then a large hand was cupping the back of his neck and pulling him back down, preventing him from getting away as his lips landed on a pair of someone else’s.

Felix’s eyes widened at the contact and his mind frenzied to figure out what was going on, but then the pair of lips moved against his and Felix felt warmth encase every single nerve in his body as Woojin’s soft lips traced lightly over his teeth, an indescribable feeling of pure bliss blanketing every inch of his skin. 

He closed his eyes and kissed back, both hands coming to cup Woojin’s face as the warmth only spread further throughout him, surrounding him with a strange aura that felt a lot like safety, that felt a lot like home, that felt a lot like love. 

Their lips continued to move in sync as Felix began to rub his thumbs over Woojin’s cheeks, feeling Woojin’s hands moving from the back of his neck and starting to tangle in his hair, running comfortingly through the soft looks. Felix’s breath hitched at the feeling and Woojin only pulled him closer, an action that may have seemed impossible but they managed it anyway, lips still moving perfectly against each other. 

Their mouths fit so well together, lips tangled perfectly between their faces, and Felix only craved more, entire body flinching as his bottom lip was grazed gently by Woojin’s teeth. The feeling set fire to every single one of his nerve endings and his grip tightened on Woojin’s face, the older revelling in the sensation and lifting his head up closer to Felix, leaning further into his loving touch.

Kissing Woojin was a feeling Felix would never give up, not for the whole world. And judging by the way Woojin’s hands kept tightening in his hair and stroking his scalp, Woojin wouldn’t give it up either. They felt so right together, so perfect, and Felix knew in that moment that every second leading up to this had been worth it. 

They had finally caught hold of one another, and they were never letting go. 

Eventually, they broke apart, breaths fast and unsteady as they stared into each other’s eyes, Felix’s forehead coming to rest gently against Woojin’s. A million thoughts swirled in the air around them, a million questions demanding to be answered because this was so new and so unexpected and neither of them were really sure what was supposed to happen next. 

But still, all they noticed was each other. Felix was staring down at Woojin like he had hung the stars in the night sky and Woojin was looking up at Felix like he was the Sun that brightened the world every morning. Nothing else mattered to them in that moment, nothing at all.

“Wow,” Woojin eventually whispered, fingers still tangled in Felix’s hair, “That was perfect.”

“Yeah,” Felix smiled, “It was.”

**Author's Note:**

> Sooooo….. I hope you enjoyed that and you thought my writing was okay. I actually really enjoyed writing this so don't be surprised if more Woolix fics or ship fics in general start appearing on my profile in the future.
> 
> That being said, I do have mock exams coming up that I have to start studying for so it may be a while before I post anything else.
> 
> All comments, kudos and everything are really appreciated and feel free to check out any of my other fics xx
> 
> Twitter: @hotelfelixxie - I follow back and sometimes I post little mini drabbles that are too unedited or short for Ao3 if you'd like to check them out (they're in my threads) xx
> 
> Have an incredible day and remember to always get enough sleep ily xx


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